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Remaining Calm During Difficult Conversations – Derek Gaunt

Negotiations can be uncomfortable, difficult and even contentious. Former Hostage Negotiator Derek Gaunt, author of “Ego, Authority, Failure”, teaches business leaders to gain trust and negotiate evenly when emotions are running high.

Takeaways + Tactics 

  • A negotiation is nothing more than a difficult conversation. Discomfort and negative emotions impede our ability to cognitively process that which is in front of us.
  • Awkwardness promotes accelerated learning because it forces the brain to focus more. When feeling awkward, our brain is telling us there’s no synaptic connection developed for the skill. 
  • Most of us are intermittent or rebuttal listeners. We get so focused on the threat, demand or request, that we don’t try to find out which is driving it.
  • It is impossible to be angry and afraid if you’re genuinely curious about what the other side has to say.